Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Delay is freakin gay and Soccer plays hocker

Tom Delay is freakin' gay
doo dar doo dar
He done quit his job today
oh the doo dar day

He thinks he'll go to jail
can't afford the bail

Oh... Tom Delay is freakin' gay
oh the doo dar day


That was all I was gonna write this morning but I got a glimpse of The Early Show this morning where all the anchors were in a crowd with their guest of the moment. The guest happened to be the most famous American soccer player who's name escapes me cause, well, it's American soccer. So the hosts welcome him and these are his lines: "Thanks for having me. It's great to be here and as you can see I brought my friends from Claritin with me cause with my allergies, Claritin helps me keep going throughout the day nonstop." Of course he stumbled through it and they treated it like he was sooo cute. "That's all right. Hey, he plugs as good as he kicks folks!"

I know I'm in advertising so I'm supposed to defend this crap but come on. I'm only gonna defend good marketing and that was just stupid. Whoever saw that plug and actually thought, "Wow, this soccer player uses Claritin and he sounded so convinces I should try some" should make it into the Darwin awards when they die stupidly for fixing a fuse with a bullet or giving an enema to an elephant. (Thanks for the Darwin awards book, Nick.) What genius in the RX ad agency somewhere near Princeton NJ (cause that's where they ALL are) thought that would be freakin' great not to bother training this dope to get it right? I guess I'm just pissed cause of how innocently I felt toward him, like the hosts. "Oh poor baby capitalist. Trying to find his feet on his first big sponsor plug. You can do it. Yes you can, oh yes you can! (In puppy/baby talk)"

All this while I've been reading The Economist on my way to work on the train.

Oh capitalism, how I am your bitch.